The body writes

Language like the body is a place to store the soul. Attributed to Ocean Vuong.

I wanted to feel it, beyond and out of the eye of the storm. I wanted to feel the afterwards. Beyond the hour, the time, the decade, unsnapped from the actual moment, beyond the creation of the story. We are often drawn back and re-live that moment, thinking that the loop resolves, where we pace up and down in our minds, often praying to end the unwanted. In the storm you are unheard, even from yourself. It is in the time after we can learn that healing has opportunities, coming to terms with the ways things are. It is after that our bodies have the possibility of dwelling in awareness, with clear-seeing, even befriending and turning towards the present where we can feel our beauty and hear our bodies breathing. To go into the wasteland and create art out of the chaos. To discover who we have been all our lives.

© 2021 Copyright Rick Frame


An inner quiet, living within. Such is the alignment with mystery. A miracle of a dream comes true, a choice, an intention in the making. Here communing in the silence and stillness, a deepening, a potential. I don’t believe that bliss is entirely possible but we can reach for a peace that passes all understanding, eventually. Like the guys in the boat in the storm were reassured. What goes on within is more important than that which is without. Life often spell-binds, baubles and the fairy lights have their place. Eye-catching often loses its gloss. Like the earth turns, settle into the interior, the journey is worth it, at one with the shades, the breath and the path. Awareness is the morning light.

Inspired by Chris Mann and others, July 2020

© Rick Frame

Communicating mindfully – lead with presence

To the extent that I haven’t seen beyond my own conditioning, I continue my practice of mindful communication as a lifelong path of learning and transformation. Oren Jay Sofer

Oren Jay Sofer’s book say what you mean focuses on really important ideas about communicating mindfully.

I am struck by the simplicity of what he says for it is in this that he makes a powerful case for his approach.

He sets out, at once, to organise his ideas around three salient ideas – presence, intention and attention. It is carefully crafted and thoughtful and immediately arresting because he cares hugely about his subject matter.

This seems to me to be his life work. And what important work it is.

In part one, the first step, he embarks on an exploration of leading with presence.

These first principles are massively important. What I love about it is that he does not mess around with what he sees as important. He knows exactly what is.

It is all about self-awareness. ‘To say what we mean,’ he writes, ‘we must first know what we mean.’ He continues: ‘ To know what mean, we must listen inwardly and discern what is true for us.’

Simple, powerful stuff that requires practising regularly.

So to lead with presence, he says, is to show up. And we do this as ‘fully and completely as possible’. But, of course, it doesn’t just happen. We have to cultivate it carefully and thoughtfully.

This book is a must read for anyone who cares about communicating effectively. In the opening pages of the book Sofer writes:

I know I have more to learn, particularly around the blind spots of my own privilege. To the extent that I have managed to see beyond my own conditioning, the text and its ideas may support others … to liberate themselves from their own conditioning, and to step more fully into the interdependent dance of communication … To the extent that I haven’t seen beyond my own conditioning, I continue my practice of mindful communication as a lifelong path of learning and transformation.

And that what this is all about – learning to communicate mindfully is about learning and transformation. Wonderful stuff really.

Curiosity and care – a start

I am currently reading say what you mean by Oren Jay Sofer and, whilst there is so much to draw on, I have been captured by the idea of approaching a conversation with the mantra of curiosity and care.

Needless to say, this is not always my approach. I don’t intend to be careless. I do not set out to be careless. That is what I am not about as a person.

But whether or not I approach someone with real care all the time is something I am working on. Actively caring I think is the way to look at it. Thinking of their needs, thinking about what they hope to get out of the conversation is important to consider.

Of course, this raises an entire volume of thought on needs and Sofer is particularly brilliant at drawing out the key elements and understandings around the area of needs in his book.

Back to the curiosity part. I am feeling that we have to start with ourselves on this. Get curious about ourselves and what is happening in our inner landscape. This is key, it seems and has everything to do with being mindful in all the fullness of that word. It helps us to be curious about others and what is happening for them.

Which of course leads us to drilling down deeply about empathy and what this means.

Wow. A lot is happening and this is only the start.

The ‘Blue’ in School

Blue at sunset Camps Bay

It’s about the way that humans see the world and how until we have a way to describe something, even something so fundamental as a color, we may not even notice that it’s there.

Kevin Loria

I had no idea that the Ancient Greeks had no word for the colour blue until I read a review on one of Brene Brown’s books and there was a reference to Kevin Loria’s article in Business Insider UK. And it seems that these ancient peoples were not alone – Hebrew, Chinese, Icelandic.

And that got me thinking.

I often struggle to find the right language to explain something new.  A new feeling, an epiphany, a breakthrough, a struggle, a re-imagining.

So that’s why this is the School Of Blue.

Blue is the journey. And so this blog is very much about breakthroughs and coming through a space that that is uncomfortable and disruptive.

It is the liminal space of not knowing to the knowing and maybe still not knowing.

© Rick Frame